I have never broken a bone nor has anyone in my family. Don’t get me wrong, as a kid, I did a lot of dump stuff but I never got seriously hurt. I have never used a wheel chair or crutches nor has my kids (yet). So, we have been pretty fortunate.
However, this past week changed that as I managed to step on the side of a welcome mat and wipe out. Like fall, roll, and land on my back in the middle of my parent’s garage. I immediately grabbed my foot and started to cry. I laid there for about 3 minutes and decided I probably should get up and was mad at myself for falling.
As the swelling and bruising continued throughout the day, I did not seek any medical attention. Here are my logical reasons why:
1.) This happened 1 hour prior to my son’s birthday party, I couldn’t cancel it and he would have been devastated.
2.) I really didn’t think I needed medical care nor an emergency room bill.
3.) In my mind, I was hoping it would just go away (logical thinking, right). Like I would wake up the next day and it would be fine.
So, I iced my foot, limped around, tried not to touch it. I did go to the doctor the next day and have an x-ray done. Possible fractures but not broken, that was good news. But I have to wrap it, ice it, elevate it, and use crutches for a number of weeks (crutches didn’t go well, side note). And it still is very painful. The doctor also said I need to come up with a better story about how I hurt my foot, that tripping on the rug wasn’t very interesting. Agree, pretty lame.
This puts a major cramp in my style with the holidays and life in general. I go a 1000 miles a minute, I don’t slow down. I found myself taking 10 times longer to do something simple as a I limp around. I actually sat down in the middle of the hallway of my house this morning (at 6:00 am) because I was already tired, hurting and annoyed. This is incredible frustrating.
I keep thinking to myself, it will be ok, I just need to slow down. Slowing down is not a bad thing, but can be a good thing (I keep telling myself). After all, I want it to get better so I can run again and be able to keep moving with my kids. Trying to find the positive here.
My kids love games, board games, card games, etc. Now that I can’t get up, I am stationary to spend more time playing games (building Legos, puzzles, etc.) with them which is a positive. As much as I dislike playing games, they love it.
Another positive is that the kids will have to do more for themselves which they need to do. I think I say, “I am not your waitress or maid” about a hundred times a day and this situation truly limits what I can do to help them (in which they can do for themselves).
But I do feel foolish, and helpless. I hate asking for help. It will be a journey, a very long and slow journey.