What makes people happy…
I do want to start this post with a disclaimer; no one is happy every day, I don’t believe it to be possible. I think that everyone carries their stress, anxiety, etc. differently, that we carry a range of emotions and thoughts. Some heavier than others. However, I am always trying to learn more about how to be a happier, a less stressed mom, parent, spouse, employee, co-worker, and friend.
I love this post below and I believe the list to be true with the exception of adding “show gratitude”. There is no “right” or correct way to achieve happiness, but this list is a good start.
Ignore nonsense: Drama, drama, drama… we all know or have people in our lives that love to stir the pot, that love talking about others, that work hard to undermine or undercut someone. It is hard to ignore these people especially if they are family members, friends or co-workers but you can mediate your time with them. I know that if I have to be around someone who chooses to fill their day with seeking out drama, that I don’t share anything personal with them; I don’t repeat anything they say; and I try hard not to be around them much. I choose to ignore nonsense (aka gossip and drama). It’s not meaningful or purposeful conversation.
Talk less: Listen more. If you are listening to respond, you are not hearing the person. Therefore, you cannot have a meaningful conversation. I cannot tell you how many times I have been cut off in mid-sentence or talked over and then had repeated back to me what I already said. If you love and respect someone, you listen to learn, not listen talk. You can’t learn or grow as person if you are always talking or telling someone they are wrong or not hearing them. When people feel heard, they are happier. When people have listened, engaged and had a meaningfully conversation, that is a win/win for everyone.
Learn new skills: I love to learn so this makes me happy. Even if you don’t like to read books, finding a hobby or interest to start or learn about; or listen to a podcast or audio book, that inspires you, motivates you, etc. helps you to grow and brings joy. Learning a new skill is just as important as learning a new perspective. I love to read and listen to podcast to learn more about myself and the world around me. I also enjoy taking online courses, but I am a nerd.
Help less fortunate: when we help others, we are showing the best version of ourselves. I think that those who do not help others, find themselves very lonely or bitter in life. There is something about giving to others that heals our hearts, that makes us feel good and we also are helping set a good example to others. We also grow as people when we give of ourselves and our time/talents to others. To serve a purpose.
Laugh: who doesn’t like to laugh!! Laugher brings us great joy, so do what makes you smile and laugh. Surround yourself with people who make you smile and bring joy and value to your life. Don’t surround yourself with people who are negative and joyless. They will bring you down. Find joy and laugher and surround yourself with it.
Wake up early: now some people may argue me on this by saying they are not morning people. Which I completely understand. For some of us, waking early and conquering the morning, brings us joy which others get their energy from the night. Whether you are a morning bird or a night owl, use that time that you are full of energy, to hit the ground running.
No entitlement: Entitlement means that you believe that you deserve something that you did not work for. That it is someone’s job to help you or give to you and usually with no appreciation. When you feel entitled, your ability to learn, grow, help others, to listen to others, etc. goes away. Those who are the most successful and happiest, tend to be those who work hard, try hard, work on themselves, learn and grow, can say they are sorry and mean it, and create and keep long lasting relationships. Keeping entitled people at arms-length is how I deal with those with this mindset. I want to work for what I have, not have it given to me. Then that forces me to learn, grow, work hard, etc.
Happiness is achievable and different for everyone. What makes you happy or what guides you in finding happiness? What would you add to this list? I wish you luck in learning about brings you happiness or joy.